Embracing the Ordinary

by S.R.

Bipolar disorder is a monstrous, roaring beast. With its wings, you fly; with its claws, you rend. Both wonderful and terrible, it releases powerful highs and devastating lows. Its enthralling power nearly killed me. So, I have chosen to embrace the ordinary.

Most days, I try not to mourn what I have lost. Most days, I try to be grateful for the silence. Living with Bipolar Disorder I with psychosis means that I must always be medicated. I require mood stabilizers and atypical anti-psychotics. I have discovered that there are ways to help prevent the symptoms and to keep going on. The disorder is something like this: You can’t kill the beast, but you don’t have to feed it.

ORGANIZE:
Keep a regular schedule of waking and sleeping. Find what works best for you, no matter how conventional or unconventional. You will find a sense of comfort in the routine and your body will thank you.

FILL:
The world is mostly water, and so are you. So: drink plenty of water. I also recommend green, black, and white teas.

NURTURE:
Feed your body with healthy foods. Eats lots of fresh fruits and vegetables, beans, nuts, seeds, whole grains, dairy, and lean proteins. Avoid sugar and artificial sweeteners. Limit caffeine. Do your best to eat small meals several times a day. Make sure each meal contains a healthy fat, protein, and complex carbohydrate. By keeping your blood sugar stable, you will help keep your moods stable. See a nutritionist if you need to!

STOP:
If you smoke, drink, or use drugs, stop. These are often just ways to hurt and abuse yourself. Please don’t. Find a way to stop self-medicating and get the treatment you need.

MOVE:
Walk outside for 20-30 minutes everyday. If you are stuck inside, use a treadmill, jump rope, do some jumping jacks, lift some weights, stretch, dance to music, or do an exercise video. You will feel better.

MEDICATE:
Be especially careful to keep a calendar and mark the date for asking your doctor call in your prescriptions. Do not let them run out! Treat your medication supply with the same reverence a scuba diver treats his oxygen tank. These are your lifelines. Get a pill organizer and fill it weekly. Set timers if you need to. Do whatever works to keep your meds on schedule.

QUESTION:
Only you will feel the shimmers before sliding into mania and the shadows before falling into depression. Acknowledge these feelings and do something about it. Get reliable feedback: ask those you trust if they’ve noticed any warning signs. Seek help if you feel too well or if you start to feel too weird. You know exactly what I mean.

DON'T:
No matter how bad it gets—don’t give in. Don’t hurt yourself. Tell yourself the lows and the highs come and go. This is not permanent. Don’t create a permanent solution for what would have been a temporary problem.

FIND:
Find those things in life that bring you peace and joy. My primary source is my two dogs, Halford and Alice. If they hadn’t come into my life, I think I would not have remained in mine. I also enjoy reading, learning, studying, writing, coloring, cleaning, cooking, exercising, and eating. What do you like? Do it!

ACCEPT:
Even with your best efforts, you will experience highs and lows. This disorder is going to last you your whole life. You will baffle family and friends. You will lose jobs. You will be discriminated against and marginalized. You will encounter people who blame your illness a myriad of things in an effort to try and find sense in the senseless and the nonsensical. Some will be intolerably smug because they enjoy more solid ground than you. Tolerate it. They cannot change who you are and they do not determine your worth.

FORGIVE:
There is no blame to assign. It is okay to be pissed off once in a while, but you have to move on. Remember, bipolar disorder is neither a gift nor a punishment. It is merely your circumstance. A tricky one, to be sure, but one you can handle.

To embrace the ordinary, I sometimes have to work at forgiving those who treat me like I’m crazy. Often, with a laugh, I will remember that they do have a point. In the end, I remember this: the purpose of life is life. And I need to be here.